Irritating and sad
I have been asked to help with a family situation. The Haggis has an Uncle who needs to move in to some sort of assisted living facility. He is in his seventies, and in poor health. He speaks very little English and his daughter is insecure in her English, and is having difficulties dealing with various services on her fathers behalf.
To make things worse there has been an awful lot of finger pointing around this situation. Fingers pointed at the uncle, who has lived in Toronto for twenty years and yet had not managed to properly learn English, has gained quite a bit of weight and is suffering from the medical consequences. Fingers pointed at various family members for not helping him sooner.
He is a nice man. But, it seems very irritating to be around, because he is a little socially inept and terribly lonely. He is quite clingy.
It is terribly sad to watch this situation unfold around him, his family seems to be having problems for various reasons dealing with his situation. I wish that people would stop pointing fingers at each other and at him and just step up to the plate and help.
So yesterday I went to his apartment to assist with what I could. His daughter (L) and I met with a healthcare nurse and a social worker. (L) is very thankful for my assistance, though really there is very little that I have done, other than document the meeting that took place.
Very briefly, when I look at his situation I have a thought that perhaps I should have had children to "take care of me" in my old age. -And then reality swoops in and I realize how patently absurd that is. The Haggis's Uncle has no children who can help him. Hell I am not in a position to help my parents in there retirement.
I used to believe that people got what they deserved. If you are a good person that people will treat you well. But sometimes that just doesn't seem to happen. Nice little old men live by themselves get sick and get shuffled off to old age homes.
Its sad.
To make things worse there has been an awful lot of finger pointing around this situation. Fingers pointed at the uncle, who has lived in Toronto for twenty years and yet had not managed to properly learn English, has gained quite a bit of weight and is suffering from the medical consequences. Fingers pointed at various family members for not helping him sooner.
He is a nice man. But, it seems very irritating to be around, because he is a little socially inept and terribly lonely. He is quite clingy.
It is terribly sad to watch this situation unfold around him, his family seems to be having problems for various reasons dealing with his situation. I wish that people would stop pointing fingers at each other and at him and just step up to the plate and help.
So yesterday I went to his apartment to assist with what I could. His daughter (L) and I met with a healthcare nurse and a social worker. (L) is very thankful for my assistance, though really there is very little that I have done, other than document the meeting that took place.
Very briefly, when I look at his situation I have a thought that perhaps I should have had children to "take care of me" in my old age. -And then reality swoops in and I realize how patently absurd that is. The Haggis's Uncle has no children who can help him. Hell I am not in a position to help my parents in there retirement.
I used to believe that people got what they deserved. If you are a good person that people will treat you well. But sometimes that just doesn't seem to happen. Nice little old men live by themselves get sick and get shuffled off to old age homes.
Its sad.
posted by veronica at 9:11 PM
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